From Mom To Mrs. Maisel: Caroline Aaron on Choosing Family and Creative Longevity
In this episode of Mom to MORE®, Sharon Macey welcomes Caroline Aaron, an award-winning actress whose career spans Broadway, television, and over 100 films. Best known to millions as the unforgettable Shirley Maisel on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, Caroline shares what it really looked like to build a creative life while raising a family and making intentional choices along the way.
Caroline reflects on motherhood, partnership, and the power of pausing without losing yourself. From tag-team parenting long before it was common, to turning down roles in order to stay close to home, she opens up about how those decisions shaped her not just as a mother, but as an artist and a woman. She also shares how motherhood deepened her emotional range, strengthened her craft, and gave her a richer understanding of the human experience.
Tune in for a heartfelt and laugh out loud funny conversation about motherhood, creativity, reinvention, and why making yourself happy gives your children permission to do the same.
[00:00] Introduction
[02:36] Early motherhood and family life
[04:07] Partnership and taking turns
[06:57] Adjusting career choices to meet family needs
[08:10] Why happiness matters for both parents and kids
[11:39] Emotional endurance in motherhood
[13:38] How parenting experiences showed up on stage and screen
[17:12] Career pauses and the long arc of motherhood
[22:47] Lessons learned from Caroline’s trailblazing mother
[28:22] Becoming Shirley Maisel and redefining how mothers are portrayed
[37:08] Writing Caroline’s next chapter
Meet my guest, Caroline Aaron:
Instagram: @therealcarolineaaron
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Keep an eye out for episode #56 of the Mom to MORE® podcast where Sharon is joined by Gemma Alster, lifestyle influencer and creator of Stay-at-Home-Baby. Coming soon - you won’t want to miss it ♥
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Sharon Macey (01:02)
Welcome back to Mom to More Before we dive in, have to give a quick shout out to my friend, Kevin Pollack. You know him as Moish Maisel for connecting me with his onscreen wife and my guest this week, the award winning actress, Caroline Aaron, best known to millions as the hilarious and sharp-tongued Shirley Maisel on the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.
Caroline's career has spanned Broadway, television, and over 100 films, wow, working with legendary directors like Mike Nichols and Woody Allen and appearing in classics from Edward Scissorhands and Sleepless in Seattle as the pivotal late night talk show host to Primary Colors and 21 Jump Street. Most co-starred in the play Conversations with Mother and earned a Best Performance nominee from the Outer Critics Circle Award. Caroline is also
a published author and playwright. With the support of her husband, Caroline built a family life that tag teamed parenthood long before it was the norm, which she calls a quote, very ahead of its time partnership. And I love that. But she also pressed pause, turning down opportunities to stay close to home for her kids. A decision that in her words, shaped her far more than any role ever could. Today, she continues to inspire as both an actor and writer.
with her new play, Such a Pretty Face, opening off Broadway in 2026. Woohoo! Her journey is a masterclass in living creatively, loving fully, and reminding us that when we make ourselves happy, we give our kids permission to do the same. Welcome, Caroline. I am so thrilled to be chatting with you today.
Caroline Aaron (02:39)
apps.
Thank you. And I'm so thrilled we have Kevin in
pretend husband.
Sharon Macey (02:47)
So before we dive into your journey, I have an essential mom question that I ask all of my amazing moms, and that is how many kids do you have and where did you raise them?
Caroline Aaron (02:58)
I have two children and I raised my son in New York. He was born and raised in New York until he was age five. Then I moved to Los Angeles and I had my daughter was born in Los Angeles. And so she was born exclusively on the West coast. And then I came back to New York to film the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. And that's where I am right now.
Sharon Macey (03:17)
So I also have to ask, your grandkids do not call you grandma, right? So I want to know what your grandma name is. I heard it's fabulous.
Caroline Aaron (03:27)
Well, I only have one granddaughter and my son, it's my son's daughter, asked me what I wanted her to call me and I said swanky. So my husband is Papa, so we are Papa and swanky.
Sharon Macey (03:40)
I love that. I love
that.
That's very you.
Caroline Aaron (03:42)
Yeah,
it wasn't like I objected to grandma or granny or any of those kinds of things, but I just wanted it to be more personal
when she says it is so cute, I can't even tell you.
Sharon Macey (03:53)
what a fabulous name. love that. Okay, you've, thank you. I know, cause I've just got married. So I'm sure within the next couple of years, I might be a swanky. That would be so nice. So you've talked about having such a supportive partner and how you tag team parenting long before it was really a thing. And especially coming from a home where your father passed away when you were young.
Caroline Aaron (03:55)
Yes, you're welcome to borrow it when it's your turn, whoever's listening.
It's to be your time. That's it. you. Yeah.
Sharon Macey (04:20)
and your mom raised you and your siblings alone. So what did that partnership teach you about balancing career and family and relationships?
Caroline Aaron (04:29)
I think One of the elements of a successful partnership is taking turns.
I used to joke when my kids were little and say all the time that my husband was a fabulous mother because he did a lot of the grunt work. that I either wasn't good at or wasn't around to do. But I just think that The partnership was about
making sure that we were both healthy and happy, and that no one got burnt out and no one got left behind. And that way everyone was a whole. Everybody brought their whole selves into that incredible job called being a parent. I think that We're so lucky we live in this time where parenting doesn't have to be defined by gender. What's the boy's job? What's the girl's job? It's both your jobs 24 seven. So that's kind of where we were coming from. And, you know, the housekeeper that we had in L.A.
who became a member of our family, would say all the time, ⁓ my God, Jamie is such a wonderful parent. She was so astonished by how participatory he was. And I thought, you don't get any credit for doing the right thing. Not in my book. It's exactly what we should be doing. We should all be doing it.
Sharon Macey (05:33)
The kids are just as much their kids as they are your kids.
Caroline Aaron (05:36)
he me once, you know how women didn't want to be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen? Well, he didn't want to miss his kids growing up. So it was the same thing, is that women were trapped by being exclusively parents and men were trapped by not being allowed to be parents. So he has an unbelievable relationship with his children.
Sharon Macey (05:51)
Interesting.
So nice. And that he had the flexibility to make that happen. That's a gift.
Caroline Aaron (05:58)
Yeah, absolutely.
Sharon Macey (06:00)
So what do you think your kids learned from watching that kind of teamwork in action?
Caroline Aaron (06:00)
was a good.
Sharon Macey (06:04)
it was a different landscape for many years. And I think now our kids' generation, they're now having this more inclusive, we're both raising the kids sort of, you know, partnership.
Caroline Aaron (06:15)
Yeah.
when I watch my son, go, wow, he had such a good role model. can tell it's like Sunday morning. He's the one that gets up and goes to the park first because my daughter-in-law wants to take a shower or have a manicure. And there's no question that, you know, there's no A team and B team. They are the team.
I think we can be an example for them in that way by just making parenting,
like anything else, show business, sports.
Everything is better when it's a team sport,
including parenting. And so I think that's the way my son and daughter-in-law approach it. my daughter, who I know will be a mother someday, is also watching them.
she's watching her big brother parent in a certain way. And I think that all becomes information about how to do it.
Sharon Macey (06:59)
And I love that. I love that line that you just said, everything is better as a team sport. I think that's so spot on and so strong. So thank you for that.
you've also mentioned that things felt a little different between raising your son and your daughter and your choices around work shifted too. So what changed for you in that season?
Caroline Aaron (07:19)
I don't know if it's a boy-girl thing or just their thing, but my son would have moved out when he was three. You know what I mean? He was ready to hit the world. And he hit a ball over the fence when he first moved to LA. And he went to get it, and we didn't see him for two days because he was spending the night there. My daughter was a Klingon, and she didn't want to spend the night out, and she didn't want to be away from us. And I really had to take their individuality into consideration.
I wrote an essay once that was published on parenting about not wanting to have a girl because I didn't want to be anybody's role model because I didn't feel really qualified because the role of women keeps evolving and changing so much. It's so and I'm sure it's true for men too. But it was just I went, no, I don't want anybody to copy me. I don't know what I'm doing. And I thought, let them copy my husband. He's so wonderful. That'll be a good thing to do. So I think that was also part of it was for me.
in deciding whether I could ditch or not, you know, if I had a job
I did a movie when my daughter was really pretty young in Berlin and I was commuting every three weeks back to Los Angeles from Berlin. It was really brutal. But I just felt like you just can't let too much time go by.
Sharon Macey (08:26)
That's brutal. Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (08:31)
but I do believe what you said at the beginning is true. If your children see you making yourself happy, it gives them permission to make themselves happy. I think the
the era of the all-sacrificing parent, I hope, is over. I don't think that does kids any good.
Sharon Macey (08:49)
It doesn't,
and it depletes the mom who is the one who's doing all that. And you realize it takes a village to raise a kid. You can't do it on your own, nor should anyone be expected to do it all on their own.
Caroline Aaron (08:58)
for.
No, no one should. And because a lot of people have to, almost everybody I know,
both parents have to work. That might not have been true a while ago, but that is really necessary for lots and lots of families. And so you just have to make sure that no one gets burnt out. Between work and the world and their children,
We're loading up their little hard drives, so you want to be your best.
Sharon Macey (09:24)
I have to remember that. That's a great line, loading up their little hard drives. And Caroline, I love how honest you are about this because so many moms will really relate, as we just said, to that push and pull of timing.
Caroline Aaron (09:35)
an important job and it's a really hard job and it's not one where you get instant gratification. The feedback doesn't come for many, many years. know what I mean? Right.
Sharon Macey (09:45)
That's true, that's true.
I always like to say it's the toughest job you'll ever love.
Caroline Aaron (09:49)
That's right, exactly,
get a really good report until they're about 30. So keep that in mind.
Sharon Macey (09:55)
⁓
That's true. Our son recently got married and ⁓ he wrote my husband and I little notes and I was like, my God, like it made me cry. It was just, they got it, right? They saw it, they got it, they lived it, they absorbed it.
Caroline Aaron (10:05)
Bye.
You got your report card.
You got your good report card. can tell. Yeah.
Sharon Macey (10:12)
Yeah, I got a good report card. Yeah, so
nice. Caroline, such a powerful conversation. We have so much more to go. We're going to take a quick sponsor break. And when we come back, we are going to talk about how motherhood actually enhanced your craft as an actor. Don't go away. We'll be right back.
Okay, welcome back to Mom to More. I am here with the wonderfully swanky grandmother, Caroline Aaron.
So when we first spoke, you said something that really stuck with me, that parenting and acting both require emotional endurance and responsiveness. You call parents, and I quote, athletes of the heart. And I just think that's fabulous. How did motherhood expand your emotional skillset?
And how has that shown up in your work as an actor?
Caroline Aaron (12:01)
I don't know if other people have experienced this, but I felt like when I had a baby, I was so shocked by the chambers of my heart that I didn't even know were there. You know, it's like muscles in your body when you go to the gym for the first time, you go, wow, I didn't know that was there.
the expansiveness that happens inside of you when you have a baby and you are raising another person. And those are all the exact same skills really that you need as an actor. You really are responsible for sharing the human experience with people who are either watching the movie or the play or whatever it is. And I think that by becoming a mother, lots of things happened in terms of my acting. I had to be patient in a way with, I don't know what I'm doing, but I will.
You know what mean? It was like those kinds of things where I will figure it out or I would rush to make a choice or I would think it would have to be this way or I would push that
Sharon Macey (12:46)
Yeah, you'll figure it out.
Caroline Aaron (12:53)
acting is about being receptive rather than being active in a sense. And that's what parenting is about or was about for me. It was like learning how to read my child.
there's so many languages that they're throwing at you and you're not really sure is this ⁓
really upset? Is this really manipulative? Is this tired? You know, all of those colors that come in, those are the same kind of questions you ask yourself when you're creating a character. And so
I just think that becoming a mother made me more open to listening to where those answers come from. They can come from the world by how you observe the world, but they also come from just a kind of internal listening
I was on the go all the time and I wasn't really
used to that and then I started to have to really kind of sit back
One of the things that's great about having two kids is that when you're the second one you realize nothing's your fault because they really do come in already you know they already come in who they are you're not really sure about that in the first one you go my god did I do that is that my fault did I do something wrong the second one comes and they're a completely different individual you know nothing's my fault I'm so happy
Sharon Macey (13:47)
So true, yeah. Yeah.
⁓ yeah.
Caroline Aaron (14:00)
hard work. know, think
it also affected my acting career was I went, you know, it's hard work being a parent and being an actor is hard work. And I found a lot of joy in embracing how hard it is.
Sharon Macey (14:14)
Interesting,
of your experiences, did they ever end up in a script that you had to, okay.
Caroline Aaron (14:19)
Oh my god. absolutely.
Absolutely. Even playing like, let's
the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel and playing Shirley and I'm like going, okay, so I have an adult son and I remember I had an episode where I had to go into his bedroom and go, give me all your poo-poo pants and I thought, who's gonna say that to a 30-year-old man? How can I make that feel in a certain way and really understand that? And I thought, well, know, it's kind of international mother language, which
you're not used to your adult children staying with you. And when they do,
the fact that you infantilize them, again, it just makes complete sense to me that she would do that. Just that, you know, every time my kids graduated from a stage, I would be in mourning when I stopped nursing, when they were out of diapers,
Sharon Macey (15:03)
Mmm.
Caroline Aaron (15:06)
God, when they start driving, that's really the worst. they really aren't needed, you know what I mean? You're just like,
Sharon Macey (15:08)
That's a whole other thing. Yeah.
Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (15:13)
them to show up. ⁓
Sharon Macey (15:14)
You're like praying every time they leave the house until they come back. Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (15:18)
But I would always grieve each stage that was, that they graduated from while I'm applauding them. I have to go, I have to keep my grief to myself
I wrote an essay once called, How to Cripple Your Children and Make Sure They Stay at Home. Because after my son left, I went, this is such a jib. I spent all this time and now he's finally somebody I want to hang out with and he's leaving. And he never gets, you know, but that's the job, roots and wings.
Sharon Macey (15:41)
Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (15:45)
I remember when
my son got engaged and I came home and that's all you want for your children is that they find their person, right? But I came home that night and I think I was in tears and I said to my husband, he doesn't belong to us anymore. He belongs to our family. And that's the way it's supposed to be. But you have to
Sharon Macey (15:52)
Yes.
Hmm. Yeah. Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (16:03)
make a way for that, make room for that.
Sharon Macey (16:05)
Yes.
Caroline Aaron (16:06)
It's a hard thing to make room for, but that's what you.
Sharon Macey (16:08)
It is.
but he'll always be your son. Like our son will always be our son
it just looks differently. And, and as a mom,
it's hard when you realize you have done your job really well and you have given your kids roots and wings and that they go on to the next chapter of their life. Like, like we do, right?
Caroline Aaron (16:21)
Right?
Absolutely.
Like we do, and we want them to do that, but
I had a lot of feelings about it when you like walked out the door and I went, you know, he's not mine.
he belongs to the world now and now he belongs to her and now he belongs to his daughter. So each phase,
Sharon Macey (16:38)
Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (16:39)
you, get to be a part of every phase,
I read the other day and I told this to my kids cause I could see how exhausted they were from having a two year old.
that the amount,
of time that you spend with your child as a child is very short. Most of the time you spend with your children is as adults. And I thought that's really true. It's really short. So, who's ever in the midst of that cherish,
the days drag, the years fly.
Sharon Macey (17:05)
That's so true.
Caroline Aaron (17:06)
Yeah.
Sharon Macey (17:06)
I remember
when our son was born, my father and my mom came to the hospital and my father looked at me and he said, tomorrow he'll be in kindergarten. And you realize, wow, that was really true. Cause it just flies.
Caroline Aaron (17:18)
It's so fast.
Sharon Macey (17:20)
Yeah. So you made,
a choice at certain points to sort of dial back your personal career for your family.
looking back now,
personally and creatively, what did that period of your life give you that you could have not learned on any stage, from any script,
Caroline Aaron (17:34)
it made me hate my husband.
the brunch. He's got to be the brunch of everything. No, think,
Sharon Macey (17:38)
Okay, why?
Caroline Aaron (17:41)
because I was living in LA and was the first big family compromise for me because, you know, I had a very wild, active little boy. And I remember
we living in an apartment in New York City.
the first five years of his life. And we'd get in the elevator, you'd press all the buttons, and then other people would get in, and I'd look around like, I don't know who did that. I don't know what's going on. I'd be up at six in the morning playing bowling in the lobby of the building. And then when we got to Los Angeles, and he could be outside 365 days a year, just somebody said to me, if Ben was my son, I'd live in LA, because he's like a dog, you've got to run him twice a day. And I said, it's really true. And New York was confining for him.
Sharon Macey (18:01)
I have no idea how that happened right now.
Caroline Aaron (18:21)
it's like he expanded in such a big way and he was a great athlete, he is a great athlete. And so I didn't want to be in LA and that was my first big compromise. And then when I moved back to New York, I didn't want to leave. And everyone was like, you don't want to leave LA? I thought you always wanted to be in New York. And I said, but my life is in these walls because that's where everything happened with these kids,
Sharon Macey (18:41)
Hmm.
Caroline Aaron (18:43)
And so I think that there were things
that you just learn from your children all the time the world that I could never have learned from a script or a stage.
I learned how to love in a new way with them. And if I'd not been with them and had just been only career focused, I think I would feel very bankrupt right now.
Sharon Macey (19:04)
Interesting. I love that, Caroline.
Caroline Aaron (19:07)
be like, I want to go do this or I want to go do that. And I was
Broadway play at one
They were at the age where they didn't want to come with me. You know, that's one thing where you just move everybody around. Because once they start to have their own life, you know, my daughter was so hated change that if I moved a bookcase in the bedroom, she burst into tears. I certainly couldn't move to across the country.
Sharon Macey (19:15)
Hmm.
Caroline Aaron (19:27)
And I thought,
this will all come around again. I just had to keep You have to keep the long view.
Somebody told me when I first became a parent that the longest timeline you have in your life is from the time your kid is born until they go to college. you're looking at 18 years,
you're really little. It's like, my God, it seems like forever till your next birthday and it can be six months away. And then as you get older and older, these timelines stretch. And the longest timeline you're gonna have is to get them raised and out the door and you're
Sharon Macey (19:58)
Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (19:59)
that big arc, right? And then after that happens, things get smaller again,
the timeline kind of cycles back that I want to make it to, you know, their graduation or their first baby or their marriage or whatever. I want to be in health and mentally and physically so that I'm around for all of that.
Sharon Macey (20:11)
Right.
Absolutely.
I think that's something that every mom needs to
that pause is part of the longer arc, the longer storyline. Yeah. No.
Caroline Aaron (20:24)
It is. It is. It is. And it's not the whole story. It's
just a particular big chapter. and then on the other side of it, because I'm on the other side of it, because I two adult children, which is a whole other version of motherhood.
Sharon Macey (20:37)
It's a whole other thing. Yeah. Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (20:39)
whole
thing and you're just about to get into it with having a new daughter too.
Sharon Macey (20:44)
That's true.
I now have three daughters, which is so awesome. Yeah. But very well said.
sometimes you forget about that, right? That every decision that you make, and I think of all the things that we gave up because of the kids that we couldn't do, that we wanted to do, but you realize that that pause, what you're doing is it helps to build and create sort of what is going to become your next chapter in life. Yeah.
Caroline Aaron (21:06)
That's right. That's right.
and who you want to be in the world starts to be informed by them. I
was sort of amazed at how much I learned from my kids. Like my son is a major athlete and always was. And I always said in the dictionary under the word irony, it should say I gave birth to an athlete. He played basketball in Europe. He was a great basketball player and stuff like that. I would find myself walking through like department stores and there'd be televisions on and I'd
go, what's the score? And I think, who am I? Did I want to know the score of a game? I didn't even know what teams were. When he was young, I'd go, how are you getting to know him from rehearsal? He'd go, if you don't start calling it practice, I'm not coming home anymore. went,
Sharon Macey (21:41)
Right, right.
That's right. Basketball is not rehearsal, it's practice. Right.
Caroline Aaron (21:52)
practice.
By the time we were home from practice, I had to learn all of that and how I love it. I think he added sports to my life, which I would never ever have really encountered, especially, you know, being an actor,
you're not spending a lot of time with athletes. I can tell you that.
Sharon Macey (22:08)
And
you know what? That happened to us as well. All three of our kids, somehow, miraculously, all ended up
athletes.
Caroline Aaron (22:16)
You cannot believe how much time you spend on the road going to games. I just can't believe it. But I actually liked it after a while. I kind of missed it.
Sharon Macey (22:20)
Yes.
Caroline Aaron (22:24)
you. You three of them. I don't know if I could have endured that, but I mean, good for you that you got through three college athletes,
Sharon Macey (22:31)
three colleges, three college athlete. But yes, you're right. You learn different vocabulary. You learn everything you need to know. We had tennis and rowing.
that's quite the education as a mom. Caroline, I wanna go back to where your story really began, your mom.
She was a true Jewish trailblazer in the civil rights movement in the South back in the 60s. She was named one of the 100 most important southerners of the 20th century. Extraordinary. How did she inspire you and what traits of hers live on in you today?
Caroline Aaron (23:08)
she said to me one time and people were so horrified by that.
I was a kid and I'm not happy. And she went, I don't know why you think that it's an inalienable right to be happy. That's not your goal in life. Your goal in life is to leave this world a better place than you found it. And I think
that has been my biggest inspiration. was when my kids were really little, my son came home from school one day.
and he wanted some money. He was like in fourth grade. I said, what do you need money for? He said, because Casey is selling his t-shirts and I want to buy one of his t-shirts. And I said, what? And I said, let me just tell you something. Anything that you're not using, you're never going to sell because we're going to give those things to people who don't have as much as you do. So I started making them have a yard sale every year. They got to pick the beneficiary of
who they were going to give that money to and
It was a lot of work for them. had to clean out their closets and put prices on them, hang up posters in the neighborhood and stuff like that. But I think that that all comes from my mother.
My mother was
fanatical about the truth. Fanatical. My sister and I came home from camp and she was unpacking my sister's trunk and she had towels in there from a hotel that her bunk had gone on a special trip.
Sharon Macey (24:08)
you
Caroline Aaron (24:18)
And my mother said, that's stealing. And she had some policemen come to the house that were friends of hers and talk to my sister about how you don't take things that don't belong to you. And we were both there, know, our eyes were like this. And she made her say, allowance. She had to mail the towels back to the hotel.
Sharon Macey (24:33)
Interesting.
Caroline Aaron (24:37)
and then they sent them back to my sister and said it was their pleasure for such an honest customer to have a souvenir of their time there.
felt, we felt.
Sharon Macey (24:44)
I love that. I mean,
that there was good that came from being so honest,
Caroline Aaron (24:48)
I think about the world we live in where the truth is
sort of,
like on the B team of what's going on. And my mother really taught us that integrity and morality and
Sharon Macey (24:54)
Right.
Caroline Aaron (25:00)
those who have the most take care of those who have the least. That's all of our jobs. And then everything would work out,
if we all sort of felt that way. And,
I sometimes feel old fashioned.
like when my kids were in their bar mitzvah and bought mitzvah year and they would want me to give you know their friends gift cards and money and I went no I don't do that. I'm just not doing that. I said they have plenty of money and that's not what we're going to do and when my son was being bar mitzvahed I said to him you know look there's no grandparents you know to do this for so this is up to you. You're a basketball player you have a lot to do you have to learn another language it's going to be a big demand on you so
You have to decide whether you want to do this or not for yourself. And I said, and we're putting on the invitation, no presence, because this is a ritual. It's not a racket. And in Los Angeles, I can't begin to tell you what it was like. ⁓ my God. And he said, I don't want to do it. And I went, OK, we're fine with that. And then he came to us a couple of weeks later and said, you know, I think I might regret it if I don't do it. And I said, OK, well, we're 100 % behind you, because I knew how much time it was going to take from him. And I felt.
Sharon Macey (25:49)
I can only imagine the pushback. Yeah. ⁓
Caroline Aaron (26:08)
that way about a lot of things. And I was out of step with a lot of their peers and their peers' parents who were writing their essays for their kids
a lot of things that I would never do.
Sharon Macey (26:21)
you know what's
interesting about your son at 13 to realize that he might regret that later in life for not having that experience. That's really incredible.
Caroline Aaron (26:27)
I know.
was quite amazed by it
and it ended up being a very meaningful experience because it was being generated from him. And I think because my mother grew up in the deep South where she saw just such horrible injustice. What we're seeing now happening to immigrants, imagine.
Imagine that that was in her view as a child all the time, people being tormented, tortured, beaten up, excluded, and it landed on her in a way that it became her life's work to make sure that never happened again.
Sharon Macey (27:01)
what an
extraordinary role model she was for you and for the world
Caroline Aaron (27:05)
and for the world.
she was very strict, very, very strict. It's like, wow, we had to dress for dinner and we had a yes ma'am and no sir and wear white gloves and get dressed up and, you know, be like really nice people. And so I resented that constantly. But
as an adult and as a young adult, I went, I'm so proud that I'm the daughter of this woman. That was really a lucky thing for me.
when I meet people who can't stand their parents, and there are plenty of friends who don't like their parents, I don't even know how to relate to them because I was just lucky.
Sharon Macey (27:33)
Hmm.
So when you just did conversations with mother, did some of your mom come into that role?
Caroline Aaron (27:42)
Absolutely. mean, that was a play that was a two-hander and that was a play that was biographical by the play, right? And it was about an Italian Catholic mother and the overlap was quite profound between the two of them that just the intense love and
during the course of the play I went from being 37 in the play to 76 and he went from being eight to like in his 50s as the play went through their whole time together.
And he went through a period of time of being drug addicted in the story of the play, which was the story of the playwright. And to see a mother, you know, really wrestle with
when do you give up on your children? You never do. You never ever do. But
at least in the story of this play, and I thought it was really right, is this
walked out on his addiction until he fixed it.
that sort of tough love was very much the way it
Sharon Macey (28:38)
That
is important. So you didn't walk out on your son, you walked out on the addiction. And when your son was ready to come back, you were there. That's so powerful. I love that. I love that. OK, we have to talk about Maisel because that was life changing for you, right?
Caroline Aaron (28:44)
And I was there and I made that really clear. Yeah.
Sharon Macey (28:56)
how did it happen? What did it mean to you? mean, you were absolutely hysterical in that role.
I could look back at when I was a kid at my family and go, she's reminding me of that aunt.
really an extraordinary show, loved every moment of it. You were incredible in it.
Caroline Aaron (29:12)
I did.
Thank you. It happened in increments.
my daughter was obsessed with Gilmore Girls, which I had never walked. And I would be walking through the living room and it was on again. And it was like, my God. And she kept saying, mommy, if the mother and the daughter on this show had a baby, it would be you. And I didn't know what she was talking about. And then she just hounded me and I said, okay, it was on for seven seasons. And it was the story of a single mom raising her daughter until
She dropped her off at college. So we made a deal that I would watch every episode with her and we would watch the last episode together the night before I dropped her off at college, which we did. So then you fast forward
Tony Shalhoub lived around the corner from me, a dear friend for many years in LA and he was going to New York to do a new show. I think he was the first one in actually. And then
I got a call from my agent saying that Amy Sherman Pallandino was doing a new show and she wanted to talk to me about a role. And I went, yes. And they went, what do mean yes? And I said, did Gilmore Girls? The answer is yes, I don't care what it is. Because I knew what currency I would have with my daughter by being part of Amy's world. So I spoke to her on the phone and it was sort of amorphous. It was gonna be one episode, maybe two. And she described this woman to me.
a little bit as being sort of like an aunt of hers. She wasn't really sure, you know, and then she sent me the pilot. And it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. And I was like so astonished by it. And I said, my God, it is just gorgeous and so wonderful. And of course I wanted to do it. And then when I went in for my costume fitting, I kept saying, who's my husband? Who's my husband? Who's playing my husband? You know, there's all of that is so secretive. And then they finally told me already done.
a movie with Kevin and I was so excited. I don't know if he was excited, but I was so excited it was gonna be Kevin.
Sharon Macey (30:57)
He's so great.
Caroline Aaron (31:01)
he was the same as me. We did one episode, then we did a second episode. And then as we were going through the first season, when there was like maybe one or two episodes left, we both came into work and in our dressing rooms were these big, huge bottles of champagne. And Kevin and I both went, ⁓ I guess we're not in any more of it, huh?
because that was the end of our participation for that first season. We thought it was the end and we were so sad because I'm telling you, I don't know. I just wrote Amy a couple of weeks ago and I said, I just keep praying this is not the best job I'll ever have. But guess what? It's the best job I'll ever have. was the best job I'll It's true. It was so amazing. The cast was amazing.
Sharon Macey (31:23)
We thought it was the end. Okay.
You
But you had it, you had it, and that void an extraordinary opportunity.
Caroline Aaron (31:47)
Everywhere you looked, there was an A plus person. Just everywhere, everything they did about it. And I don't even know if they would put that show on right now. know, it's like the world keeps changing so fast. But it was really, it was a great experience. And whenever I'm playing a character, I have to see that person walking around in the world in order to start to have it alchemize sort of inside of me. And what was really astonishing is once the show was on, like,
how many people had Shirley in their life.
my God, everybody had Shirley in their life. And I also thought it was the only time in my life that I've ever played a character that reminded everyone of someone they loved. Everybody who told me about their Shirley, it was somebody that they loved or they got a big kick out of or that they missed if they were no longer part of their world. And something like that is so satisfying.
Sharon Macey (32:18)
hello. We all do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
And that you brought in, I'm sure, aspects of your mom and obviously you
as you created this fabulous character, in addition to like the clothes and the girdle and, you
Caroline Aaron (32:52)
because of the way that they write
and they're so open is I didn't want her to be nagging. And you know, all of the cliches that go with a Jewish mom,
I worked with the great Shelley Winters once in a movie. And that was when they were delivering scripts and they delivered a script to Shelley on the set. she...
She was really angry and she said, I'm sick of it, I'm sick of this. Because she was at the age of playing someone's mother. And she said, you know, all scripts are written where the mother is the object of scorn. People roll their eyes when she walks into the room. They talk behind her back. They make fun of her. That's what all our comedy is based on. And she went, and I'm not doing that because they're the heroes of our society. They're the ones that don't leave.
Sharon Macey (33:34)
I'm so glad you said that because yes, thank you, Shelly Winter
saying that.
Caroline Aaron (33:38)
that's she.
Sharon Macey (33:39)
We are, yes. And I want every mom listening to this to realize just how pivotal we are in this world, not only to our family, but to the world at large and everything that we bring to the table, whether you realize it or not, how impactful we are as women, as humans, as moms to everybody else.
Caroline Aaron (33:40)
We are, and she was.
So, poor...
And when she said that to me, so when I was working on Shirley, it was really important to me that she wasn't somebody, I mean, obviously she was all those things, but that I wanted her heart to be her point of lead, not that she was a nag, not that she was impossibly demanding. All of those things that you see, and ever since Shelley said that to me, every time I read something, I go, wow, it's still going on.
When you get to be the age where you're playing someone's mother, which I have been now for a while, you are really, it's really unbelievable how mothers are mostly written the character to avoid.
Sharon Macey (34:32)
Well, I hope that changes, because it should.
Caroline Aaron (34:34)
Me too.
Sharon Macey (34:35)
OK, so you've handled motherhood, Broadway, and Hollywood. So this next
series of questions are going to be really easy for you. We're going to do a quick lightning round, one to two answers. Are you game?
OK, let's go, girl. All right, number one, rehearse or improvise?
Caroline Aaron (34:53)
no, okay. I love them both so much. love them both so much. ⁓ Rehearse.
Sharon Macey (34:59)
Okay, theater, TV, or film?
Caroline Aaron (35:03)
theater.
Sharon Macey (35:05)
You're a theater baby. The most Shirley Maisel thing you have done in real life.
Caroline Aaron (35:11)
Feeding people, feeding, feeding, feeding, cannot stop feeding people and neither could Shirley. And also, I mean, Shirley took this from me. She was a smoker, I was a smoker, but the most Shirley thing I do is whenever anybody walks in the door, are you hungry? Do you want something to eat? I have something for you yeah.
Sharon Macey (35:27)
Yeah, it's
a Jewish mom thing.
Your most cherished acting nomination or win.
Caroline Aaron (35:33)
was given a lifetime achievement award by the Sephardi Film Festival last year. And it was such an honor, I have to say. I don't know if that's a win, but that felt like a win for me. And I'm gonna amend that too. I was nominated for Best Supporting Actress for Bye Bye Birdie at the Kennedy Center last year. And I was so thrilled because I don't sing. I'd never been in a musical and it was really a big deal for me.
Sharon Macey (35:45)
Absolutely. Yeah.
That is huge. Congratulations on that. I was not aware of that. Okay, one word to describe motherhood.
Caroline Aaron (36:07)
joyful.
Sharon Macey (36:08)
Hmm. One word to describe reinvention.
Caroline Aaron (36:14)
Always.
Sharon Macey (36:15)
Yes, I love that.
Thank you.
Fabulous answers. Thank you for that, Caroline. my gosh, our time is coming to a close. I could talk to you for like another hour at least. And I have a question that I ask all the amazing moms that have the privilege of interviewing. And that is, since this is the Mom to More podcast, Caroline Aaron, what is your more?
Caroline Aaron (36:40)
to be a produced playwright, to write plays, to put out there in the world what's inside of me by way of writing.
Sharon Macey (36:48)
I love that. And you will.
Caroline, such a joy. Thank you for sharing your heart and your immense wisdom and your lived experience. And just what a fabulous conversation. I am so grateful for your time. Thank you.
Caroline Aaron (36:52)
so fun.
Sharon Macey (37:03)
Why don't you please tell our listeners where they can follow along with you, find you online. Folks, everything is going to be in the show notes.
Caroline Aaron (37:10)
I'm a social media newbie. I mean, I'm kind of not so good at it, but I am on Instagram at The Real Caroline Erin and probably other places that I don't even know about. I'm just learning as I go along. Do you know what mean? I'm always looking for young people to teach me more.
But that's where you can find me. I don't have a website. But I just was looking up yesterday, I was Googling, I'm going to take classes in AI. I want to learn it right now because I don't want to get behind. I'm so behind on everything else. I thought, well, I better start right now and learn this.
Sharon Macey (37:42)
not. Hey,
I'm a tech boob at heart. So yeah, anytime you can learn something new. No, I'm a tech boob. I'm just the opposite. Yeah. Yeah. Our kids exactly the kids help
Caroline Aaron (37:44)
you a tech girl? You know tech. You are okay. they help. ⁓
Sharon Macey (37:54)
Thank you, my friend. This has been so lovely. I really appreciate your time and thank you for the gift of being you.
Caroline Aaron (38:00)
so bad off.
And same with you, I want to know what inspired you to create this. Did you feel lonesome as a mom or you needed a mom community that you didn't have?
Sharon Macey (38:13)
is interesting. I've never had a guest ask me a question. So thank you for that. I started Mom to More because I had been a stay at home mom for almost two decades and realized that if I could reinvent myself into my next phase of fabulousness that any mom could,
I was no different than anybody else. And so I realized that I knew so many women who had done the mom thing and then they went on to another chapter of their life. And I felt that these stories really needed to be amplified and told.
And so that's why I started the podcast and I love amplifying these stories. What you've done, you took a pause, you came back and then how brilliantly you came back and had the opportunity with Maisel and all the other work that you've done over your entire career. But that's why, and I thought these stories need to be told and it can inspire other women to go, okay, I leaned into family life and now still things that I want to do in life.
and I still have aspirations and I can do that.
Caroline Aaron (39:07)
I'm so glad and congratulations on this podcast having risen up and being nominated. I'm really excited for you and you are relentless. And that is one of the things that I've been for all of us is that we have to be relentless and.
Sharon Macey (39:13)
Thank you.
I appreciate that.
Relentless
and impatient and resilient and gritty and determined and all that sort of fun stuff. Yes. Anyway, you're a love. Thank you so much for your time. This has been amazing.
Caroline Aaron (39:31)
Thank you sweetie.